Wednesday, November 26, 2008

A true e-mail I sent this week...

Hi Professor W.,

I left you a voicemail this morning. i was bitten very badly by our cat Friday night on my R wrist. By Saturday eve, I had to go to the hosptal b/c my arm, wrist and hand had become swollen and infected. I got IV antibiotics, and cannot use my right hand at all for a week. I have practically no function in the hand at all. It is in a sling. I am typing w my left hand. What can we work out for the test tomorrow? I won't be able to write until Saturday, November 29th.


Deb K.

Turns out introducing the cats has been quite the challenge. Last Friday they were in the same room, looking at one another, debating what they wanted to do. I decided I should compliment and pet Madeline, our "resident cat", so that she felt loved, important, you know, her self esteem wouldn't suffer. I mean, a cat's self esteem is important, right? Right? Hmm...

Bad idea. Madeline mistook my hand reaching down as an act of aggression, and proceeded to bite down on my wrist, puncturing it. Here's the aftermath...

This is a cell phone picture, but you can see the punctures on my wrist, accompanied by spreading dark redness, swelling, a hand that wouldn't bend for days. Oh, there are also pen marks on my arm. That was on purpose so the hospital could see if it was getting worse. Last night, one of the punctures resembed a zit. I squeezed it, and it behaved just like a zit. Gross.

Quite painful. Quite stupid on my part. The only good thing is I didn't have to take my exam this week. I have to take it Monday morning.

We (my friend Jen and I) had fun in the ER. The staff wasn't busy and we got to hear great stories of escapades that have landed people in the ER. It appears that people like to stick things up their butts. Things like:

  • A can of Aqua Net hairspray
  • An eyeglasses case
  • A vibrator that was still running, yet stuck. They had to let the batteries run out before the person went to surgery.

Finally, lots of people have gone to the ER with cat bites. Apparently I'm in good company. I'm just glad I didn't go in with a cat shoved in my butt. I can't imagine under what circumstances something like that would happen. Then again, I doubt some of those other folks intended to get things in their butts either.

On that super appetizing note, Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!


lisagh said...

Sorry about your wrist! Here's a little story that might make you smile.

My older brother's ex-GF was a nurse in the ER. One evening a woman came into the ER with a brand new entire bar of soap stuck up her hooey. Every time they tried to get it out, it slipped and went up further. Finally, an ingenious resident had the idea to flush it out. They sprayed water up there for a good amount of time until the soap got soft and gooey and then it was able to be grabbed with tongs.

I don't know about you, but for me, there's only so far I'll go to be "April Fresh"!

Megryansmom said...

Ouch, so sorry about your wrist.

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

That looks pretty painful! Be careful that it starts to heal...I've heard stories of catscratch fever. I had no idea that it really exists but it does.

Nice of the professor to give you some time off.

Take care of your wrist and stay away from pmsing kitties.

Megan said...

Thanks for the good laugh. Happy to not have anything stuck up my bum! LOL! :)

Cindy said...

You have fun anywhere you go, don't you?? I think even the ER would be fun with you.

Have a happy Thanksgiving, silly.

bernthis said...

I volunteer in an ER and yes, the stories, well, sometimes you just can't write this stuff.

I am a dog person. Cats always intimidate me. I feel like they just stare at you with this look that says, "You're an idiot".

To me, look on a dog's face tells me he thinks he's the one that's stupid.

Happy Thanksgiving.

J'Ollie Primitives said...

I'm thankful that you typed all of that one-handed. :)
Hope your wrist feels better, that looks p.a.i.n.f.u.l.!

Annie said...

Holy moly! I'm scared of cats for this reason- getting scratched or bitten!
Hope it feels better!

Wonder if the guy with the vibrator up the butt has any feeling left what so ever!?!?!?

Tenakim said...

OMG- you poor thing- first the finger, now this!
Did your professor buy it- it's so crazy, it sounds made up!

jill jill bo bill said...

We had MANY things to retreive- lightbulbs, ink pens, etc. One night we had consecutive surgeries on two different guys with vibrators up there. A blue one was removed from the first guy, then we took out a bright pink one out of the next one. Dr Santos asks if they were at the same party. That, my friend, is why nurses and doctors are sickos and drink and smoke...